I posted this on my personal social media page yesterday and really, should have shared it as a blog....I'm learning. LOL
Yesterday in my post about the hornet situation, I mentioned that I was going to let you know what I’ve been doing to help myself get through all of the big emotions from the week.
Yesterday in my post about the hornet situation, I mentioned that I was going to let you know what I’ve been doing to help myself get through all of the big emotions from the week.
So, here we go…..
Originally when I created this post, I was coming from the aspect that my ‘cup runneth over’ and that the hornet issue was the tipping point to an extremely active emotional rollercoaster that I have been on this year…..like so many other people. While this is how I was feeling on Thursday when I first started writing this post, my perspective around this entire situation keeps changing so I keep rewriting this post to reflect my changing perspective.
See, originally, I was judging myself for how I was feeling, how I was reacting, the thoughts I was having around the hornets and oh, how that rabbit hole was dark and deep. I was mad that my husband, Graham, wasn’t feeling the same way I was about this situation. I felt stupid for feeling the way I was feeling and I felt extremely alone.
And I’m sure some people who read my post yesterday may have thought, ‘big deal, who cares…it’s just a bee’. I was not speaking positively to myself, I was beating myself up for how I was feeling and reacting…..all of which I KNOW DOES NOT help me, in fact, it does quite the opposite. And I know this…..I talk about this with friends and family members and in my Facebook Group ALL THE TIME! So, step one was to appreciate how I was feeling and change the words I was speaking over myself.
And I’m sure some people who read my post yesterday may have thought, ‘big deal, who cares…it’s just a bee’. I was not speaking positively to myself, I was beating myself up for how I was feeling and reacting…..all of which I KNOW DOES NOT help me, in fact, it does quite the opposite. And I know this…..I talk about this with friends and family members and in my Facebook Group ALL THE TIME! So, step one was to appreciate how I was feeling and change the words I was speaking over myself.
Earlier this summer, I became a certified ‘Aroma Freedom Technique’ Practitioner.
What is ‘Aroma Freedom Technique (AFT)?’ I’ll try to keep this as brief as I can….it’s a step-by-step process for identifying and releasing negative thoughts, feelings and memories that interfere with reaching our goals and dreams. It is meant to be used as a way to set a person’s emotional energy flowing in a positive direction, towards growth and expansion rather than contracting in fear and doubt. And we use Young Living essential oils to trigger a permanent shift in how we view ourselves and the world.
What is ‘Aroma Freedom Technique (AFT)?’ I’ll try to keep this as brief as I can….it’s a step-by-step process for identifying and releasing negative thoughts, feelings and memories that interfere with reaching our goals and dreams. It is meant to be used as a way to set a person’s emotional energy flowing in a positive direction, towards growth and expansion rather than contracting in fear and doubt. And we use Young Living essential oils to trigger a permanent shift in how we view ourselves and the world.
While I am now certified in this technique and I absolutely love helping others with it, for some reason, I didn’t even think about using it on myself until Thursday. I can’t explain why but I didn’t even think of it, maybe I wasn’t ready for it, I don’t know. What I do know is that after I walked myself through some AFT sessions, the proverbial onion started to peel and I have so much clarity, my outlook has changed, I am speaking positively about myself again all of these steps are allowing me to move forward and I feel so much stronger.
I have been able to recognize that:
• It’s OK for me to have all of these emotions and to feel how I’m feeling, we are all different;
• It’s OK that Graham is not experiencing the same emotions. He does not have to feel the same way that I do. It does not make either one of us a bad person;
• I was speaking poorly over myself and berating myself for how I was feeling;
• Other people perceptions of me, is NONE of my business, I need to be me, authentically me…period;
• I have experienced similar feelings in my life but have yet to deal with those emotions from those memories, until now; and
• While I can’t control the situation, I can control how I react to the situation.
There is no right or wrong way to feel about this....well, maybe I should rephrase that.... it’s not OK that the bees have invited themselves to set up shop inside the walls of our house and throw a party and then allow their guests to continue to search the premises for more locations to have fun. I’m trying to find the humor in this.....LOL.
Yesterday, I was feeling stronger so I decided to come out of seclusion and take a picture to go with my post for yesterday. I took some deep breaths and left the bedroom with determination that I am going to get through this. Right after I took the picture a bee came out of the vent and those feelings, tears, etc. were right there again. I walked away in tears, took some deep breaths, put my hands on my heart kept repeating my affirmation ‘I AM Safe’. I sat back at the dinning room table to work on my post. Yes, my head was still spinning like a shiny disco ball looking for hornets. And every time I felt the emotions coming up, I would smell my oils and say my affirmation. And you know what…..I was able to sit here, create the post and later in the night actually post it.
This morning we attended the virtual funeral for my great Uncle which was being held in Manitoba and I just kept doing the same steps that I did yesterday. Yes, I am still looking for bees but my head is not going to spin around anymore and I have been able to sit here ALL day. I didn’t need to take any trips to hide out in the bedroom with the kitties to make it through the day….I stayed out here and you know what? It feels amazing and I’m feeling so much stronger.
I haven’t shared that I am certified in AFT or the love I have had for my essential oils for the past 4 years but I am now able recognize why. I was worried about what others would think and say. So many people think essential oils are voodoo oils, snake oils, etc.…. I’ve heard it all, so I didn’t want to share about it. I am truly blown away at how much my perspective has changed after doing the AFT’s this week and all of the lightbulb moments that have been happening for me. And, yes, I know, just like anything, the person needs to be open to it and while something may work for you, it may not work for someone else.
I had the tools that could help me right there at my fingertips.
I just had to be open and ready to do the work. And because I continue to put into practice what I have learned, I am helping myself to move in the right direction. I also reached out for help, with posting about the hornets. Thank You again to everyone that has commented, called or sent texts to help. I so appreciate all of you!!! Because of all of these things, I can say with absolute confidence that I am going to be OK, everything is going to be OK. And, I’m optimistic that I will feel strong enough tomorrow to ending the seclusion for our kitties and can allow them to freely roam the house again.
I just had to be open and ready to do the work. And because I continue to put into practice what I have learned, I am helping myself to move in the right direction. I also reached out for help, with posting about the hornets. Thank You again to everyone that has commented, called or sent texts to help. I so appreciate all of you!!! Because of all of these things, I can say with absolute confidence that I am going to be OK, everything is going to be OK. And, I’m optimistic that I will feel strong enough tomorrow to ending the seclusion for our kitties and can allow them to freely roam the house again.
If you are still reading this, Thank You, and I hope that me sharing my experience will help someone else. 
And if, you have any questions about AFT or essential oils, please don’t hesitate to ask me and I can assure you that I won’t be hesitating to share about either of these helpful tools going forward either! 
Do you have a vision for your future?
Are you actively working on that vision every single day?
I used to say ‘Yes’ to EVERYTHING for everyone else except me. I would fill up our weekends with a long list of things we needed to do for others.
At the end of the weekend, I would be thankful to have helped others, yet mad at myself as I accomplished nothing on our own To Do List and I was way too exhausted to start tackling it.
While I have a vision for my goals and dreams, my 'people pleasing' tendencies were not allowing me the time or space to work on them.
What have I learned about saying 'Yes' to anything and everyone else's needs?:
- that there is no time left for me to work on what matters to me, including my dreams.
- saying ‘Yes’ to someone just because I feel obligated is not OK. If I have the time and the ability to help, then OK, I’m all in.
- by saying ‘Yes’ to everyone else’s needs and putting mine on the back burner, I am showing others, including myself, that their needs are way more important than mine. And that’s not OK. Now I am being a better example for others by saying 'No' when appropriate.
At my prior job, when a situation presented itself and it was not aligned with what either my co-worker or I needed to focus on, yet we wanted to jump in and say 'Yes' to fix the issue/situation but really we should be saying 'No', we got into the habit of saying this statement to each other to help us stay on track,
‘Someone else’s poor planning does not make it my priority.’
- The word ‘No’ is so small and yet it is such a powerful word.
What I have learned from saying 'No' from anything and everything:
- I am now giving myself the space to be the best version of me.
- I am freeing up time to work on me, my goals, personal development, self-care time and so much more.
- I am not saying that you should say ‘No’ to everything. As I still say 'Yes', especially if it's a true emergency.
- I simply take a moment or two before jumping right in to reflect on what I have on my plate and evaluate whether or not it's the right choice for me to say 'Yes'.
- I may even bite my tongue and have some internal chatter with myself afterwards to give myself grace and remind myself that I am NOT being selfish. I am setting healthy boundaries for me and my time....and that's OK!
With it being the start of a new month, it’s always a great time to re-evaluate. So, audit what’s on your plate for the upcoming month and decide what tasks, commitments, etc. need to be removed from your plate.
Ask yourself, what else am I doing that is no longer serving me or allowing me the time and energy to focus on my goals and dreams?
And when you free up some time, make sure you are using that time wisely to work on you, your dreams and your goals.
The only thing holding you back.....is YOU!
If you would like to start making little changes in your daily habits to help you move towards the life you desire, come and join us in our free Facebook Community, simply CLICK HERE.
Have you ever really paid attention to the conversation that goes on in your head?
I have been working on getting back into my morning routine. Getting up at 5am, moving my body for a minimum of 30 min, showering and then starting my day. While I have not been successful in getting up at 5am, I have been consistent with moving my body. Normally, I would allow my lack of getting up at 5am as I promised myself to stop me from moving my body no matter what time I finally dragged my butt out of bed and say ‘there’s always tomorrow’. Rinse and repeat and by the end of the week, I did not move my body for the minimum of 30 min as I promised myself.
This would often trigger negative self-talk, feeling bad about myself and the downward spiral would start.
While I was on my walk this morning, I was embattled in a constant back and forth chat with my inner child who was determined to derail my exercise today.
Here is a snippet of my inner dialect this morning between my Inner Child (👶) and Myself (👩🦰).
👶: OK great you are moving your body, but let’s go up this street and cut up that street and you’ll be home in no time.
👩🦰: Keep walking. You promised yourself to walk to the ocean and enjoy the view.
👶: Aargh. OK fine. What if you walk along the golf course and up this street and then cut through the mall parking lot and through the park, you’ll be home and still get your 30 min in...your shower is going to feel amazing!
👩🦰: Would you please stop! You are going to the ocean. You promised. Keep the promise you made to yourself. You are worth it!
👶: I can feel blisters forming and your muscles in your legs, knees and arms are screaming at you....can’t you hear them? If you call Graham, he’ll come and get you and you’ll be home in no time and enjoy that shower!
👩🦰: Yes, I feel the blisters but there’s nothing I can do about them now. Your muscles are not screaming they are rejoicing because you are using them. They are celebrating. Graham is working you are NOT bothering him. This is not life and death, you are moving your body and going for a walk. Look ahead I can see the oceanside just down the street. You can do this!
👶: I don’t want to go to the beach anymore. Why are you doing this to me? I want to me at home in my jammies.
👩🦰: Too late...you are almost there! And you do want to go the beach, it’s your happy spot and you are going to be so grateful once you get there. I am so happy to be moving my body.
👶: OK, we are at the beach. You proved me wrong. Your blisters are huge let’s call Graham. Maybe you can take the bus home...look it’s right there.
👩🦰: I love this place. I love the scent. I love the breeze on my face. I did it! I made it to the beach!! Yes, your blisters hurt but that’s OK. Take your time going home and let’s see what we can appreciate along the way back. I am not calling Graham and I am not getting on the bus. I walked here, I will walk home. I got this!
In the past I would have let my Inner Child win and I would succumb to her derailing my plans/goals. What I realized this morning is that all of the work I have been doing on my mindset and with the Aroma Freedom Technique sessions, the work I have been doing IS working.
I did not allow my Inner Child to win today.
I had a goal and I stuck to it and crushed it.
Yes...with some blisters but that’s OK, my positive mindset took charge today and outshined my Inner Child.
As I walked home, I took the time to look around and enjoy the beauty all around me and that I had failed to appreciate on my way to the beach. I found gratitude in the beautiful flowers that so many homeowners have carefully planted and tended to and in turn finding that gratitude lifted my heart as I made my way home after successfully completing my morning walk. Such a powerful way to start my day and a wonderful gift to myself to see that my hard work on my mindset is paying off.
I am SO excited for what the future holds!
PS - If you would like to hear a little bit about some of my morning routine habits that I am getting back on track with that help me conquer my days, click HERE to receive my FREE e-book. Yup, totally FREE.
PSS. If you like my outlook and want to spend more time with me, come and join my free Facebook group where this is just one of the many things we talk about. Just click HERE to come and join us today!
